Tuesday, July 31, 2007

EXCLUSIVE: Music against Fatah al Islam terror!

Regular readers of Harryzzz might think: Oh, my god, when will this guy stop nagging about the use of teargas against Fatah al Islam?! (sea earlier posts)

Well, as of now, no more teargas as a way to defeat Fatah al Islam terrorists in the Nahr al Bared refugee camp in northern Lebanon. The new medicine: VERY LOUD MUSIC.

Seriously - If you play EXTREMELY loud music for an extended period - for sure the audience will turn mad. As Nietzsche already wrote: "In music the passions enjoy themselves."

The American Army used this tactic to get Panama's dictator Noriega out of his hideout, the Holy See's embassy (i.o.w the Vatican embassy of the Roman Catholic church) in Panama-city, in 1990. They placed enormous loudspeakers around the embassy. For days in a row US soldiers played very loud rock music, among it: Panama by Van Halen. After a couple of days, the nuns and the priests inside the embassy complained to the Americans. They too were loosing it. Again a couple of days later, a shaken Noriega surrendered.

The Lebanese army should do the same. Drive truckloads of huge speakers towards the camp. Park these trucks, including large generators, in a safe, but close vicinity of the area where Fatah al Islam militants are hiding. Then, press the play button and wait for five days. The best thing is to play only one song, continuously for five days. Lebanese soldiers surrounding the camp should all use noise reducing headphones (The best one is: The Bose QuietComfort™ 2 Acoustic Noise Cancelling® Headset - but at 300 usd a little expensive. So the army should provide soldiers with cheaper ones.)

The question though is which music will annoy Fatah al Islam most?????

I made a top three of songs:

1. Obviously, the bearded boys of ZZ Top come into mind. I mean, ZZ top and Fatah al Islam could be brothers. I suggest the song "Legs". At the other hand - it is pretty melodic. Even after five days the Fatah al Islam boys might like it.


2. In order to really annoy Fatah al Islam, why not play Hava Nagila, a popular Hebrew song that is sung at Jewish weddings! Hava Nagila means: Let's rejoice. Especially the third part of the song will be rather appropriate for the occasion:

Uru, uru achim! - !עורו, עורו אחים - Awake, awake, brothers!
Uru achim b'lev sameach - עורו אחים בלב שמח - Awake brothers with a happy heart.

I bet - after 5 days Hava Nagila, the militants will come out even crazier than they went in. Especially when performed by loonie Thai musicians. Check out this hilarious version of the song!


3. Kortatu from Basque Country. One of my all time favorite bands. Kortatu is pretty mental, ETA-loving and this song Zu Atrapatu Arte for sure will turn Fatah al Islam up side down on day two.


Anybody who has other music suggestions, please post your favorite song in the comment section.

Harald Doornbos

22 comments:

knicksgrl0917 said...
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ella said...

Harald

I am afraid that some of my favourite songs like the one about Warsaw 1944 uprising these people may like a little bit too much,on the other hand this one may really annoy them, particularly played over and over and over. The singer, Eyal Golan, is supposedly very popular among jewish settlers. ;-)

Oh, and although I don't like them Tatu (a group from Russia) may have a good annoying songs. A lot of their songs are about love between women.

Cornelis said...

Anything by Celine Dion should force people with a bit of taste or decency out.
Pardon?
Oh well, you may try it anyway...

Wim Heitinga said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Sytze Vliegen said...

The Dutch Death, aka Gert and Hermien should do the job!

Anonymous said...

May I suggest Jantje Smit? That will kill them too.

waverider said...

how bout the immigrant song by led zeppelin...

Wim Heitinga said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Philip said...

The Basque band sounds really great Doornbos. Never knew journalists liked punk. Anyway, my suggestion to get someone in the loony bin:
The Casualties from New York. Always in for a good old fashion streetpunk song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RoDP3rOT1kk

also recommendable;
Terror - One with the underdogs.

If they don't come running out after this song, they probably killed each other during a gigantic Islamic moshpit :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1iUI9rHv2ok

Anonymous said...

Een paar suggesties:

Ozzy Osbourne - Suicide Solution
Finntroll - Trollhammaren

Ronnie M. said...

I think you should use the new song of Nawijn. That will teach them.

Philip said...

wim heijtinga,

ur such a douche

straat said...

I just returned from a trip to Lebanon yesterday. It seemed to me the Lebanese people really liked Dutch DJ's. So why not get Tiesto over there to spin a few records to drive them out. After that he can just continue to lead a victorious party :P

jordi said...

Harald,

My personal Top 6:
- Gloria Gaynor: Never can say goodbye
- Brood & Vrienden: Als je wint heb je vrienden
- Phil Collins: Something Happened On The Way To Paradise
- Frans Halsema: Vluchten kan niet meer
- The Police: Message in a Bottle
- The Dubliners: The Sick Note

The Sick note seems the most appropriate to me:

Dear Sir, I write this note to you to tell you of me plight
and at the time of writing, I am not a pretty sight;
me body is all black and blue, me face a deathly gray
and I write this note to say why Paddy's not at work today.

jordi said...

Sorry: Brood & VrienTen

Harald Doornbos said...

@ philip

'Casualties' a great idea! Not only their music but their hair will go really well in the Middle East!

Glad you like Kortatu. Try as well Negu Goriak (basically the same guys as Kortatu under a new name), or Herzainak (nice Basque rock music - little bit more melodic). And of course Eskorbuto!

cheers,

Harald

Ingmar said...

What about Queen white "anotherone bites the dust"?? Or is that to provocatif?

Hoxha said...

Mijn suggesties:

Slayer - Angel Of Death (8-bit midi version)


Everything from Atari Teenage Riot


And of course 24/7 Klezmer will get them out of there holes

Harald Doornbos said...

TONIGHT I'LL PUBLISH THE ULTIMATE FATAH AL ISLAM TOP-10. Roepie-roepie!

Anonymous said...

I think this should do the job, and then for five days repeatedly and extremely loud:

S.O.D. - Speak English or Die!

Anonymous said...

How about the Polka version of Bohemian Rhapsody by Al Yankovic? That'll teach them!

Dave said...

"Het meisje met de prei" will do the trick,
definitely.